As the third anniversary of the Parkland shooting rolled around President Joe Biden predictably danced all over the graves of the murdered students to call for the disarmament of people who had nothing to do with it and most of whom don’t even live in Florida, let alone in Broward County.

Never mind that the shooting was a failure of government from top to bottom as the nutbag shooter (whom I refuse to name, subscribing to the “some idiot” theory of covering these things) was on multiple radars — to include the FBI — roundly ignored, and then left to rampage as the Coward of Broward huddled behind his car, lest his own precious arse be imperiled.

None of that matters, of course, either to Biden — or to the smug, sanctimonious “minds” at the Chicago Sun-Times editorial board.

In an editorial published late Monday evening, they — much like their new messiah Uncle Joe (where have I heard someone called that before, oh da, Josef Vissarionavich) — used dead children as political props to advance an agenda that would have done nothing to save them.

Moreover, and just as despicable, they claim the only reason nothing is being done is “threats of violence” from gun owners.

The political give-and-take at the heart of a democracy can’t function under a threat of armed violence. The Jan. 6 attack on the U.S. Capitol has warned our nation, like nothing that’s come before, that lawmakers at all levels are vulnerable to such threats.

The United States needs to act before elected officials become paralyzed by threats from a small minority of pro-gun absolutists.

For too long, threats of violence have been used to intimidate lawmakers who are trying to address gun violence. The Jan. 6 insurrection will only embolden those who make the threats.

Got that? 

First, if you support the Second Amendment you’re an absolutist. Second, clearly gun owners are liable for what a slim few did on Jan. 6

But the editorial board is not done, oh no.

No, we must first eliminate open carry nationwide and ban all modern sporting rifles.

Two big steps needed now are the elimination of the open carrying of weapons in the United States and the elimination or rigorous regulation of civilian ownership of military-style firearms.

How precisely they intend to end open carry is unclear, since it’s a state-level decision, not federal, but away with thee, foul logic!

On Jan. 6, America saw an act of anarchy aimed at stopping lawmakers from doing their jobs. No one can feel confident that our nation won’t see more such attempts, from Washington to state capitals to city halls. Current laws are so lax they essentially give military weapons to terrorists.

“Essentially” is another way of saying “They don’t actually do this, but I’m going to pretend they do.”

And no, modern sporting rifles are not “military weapons” nor are they frankly “military-style.” While they may LOOK like current issue, it does behoove us to remember that the AR-15 came out before the M-16 it resembles and was marketed as a civilian varmint rifle — more than 50 years ago.

This goes on and on but the basic premise here is that A) guns are bad and B) guns in the hands of civilians not only kill people but are going to be the end of the Republic.

They endorse the end of immunity for manufacturers so they can be sued into oblivion when someone misuses their product — which would put gun companies in a rather unique position, since you can’t sue the manufacturer of a car when someone drives it through a crowd killing people.

The stupidity in this thing is legion.

Videos are circulating on social media that teach how to modify assault weapons to make them fully automatic and how to make hollowed-out bullets that are more damaging to human bodies. There also are videos teaching how to make plastic guns printed on 3-D printers that can’t be spotted by metal detectors and can’t be traced. Homemade “ghost guns” that don’t have serial numbers are proliferating.

Yeah, there are videos showing how to modify an AR-15, AK-47 and such. Of course doing so is illegal, a federal felony and if you get caught doing so without the requisite license you’re headed to big-boy jail for a very long time. As far as the “hollowed out bullets” thing, I can’t even. Those are called “hollow points” and you can buy them at Wal-Mart.

Even if you COULD print a gun with a plastic barrel, the minute you LOAD it, a metal detector will pick it up. “Ghost guns” are perfectly legal — for one person — but since it doesn’t have a serial number selling it would be another major federal felony.

Of course, inadvertently, they completely invalidate all their own points — and make the same argument gun owners have for years.

Our culture is inundated in ways to get around gun laws.

Yup. Those who want to always will, and that doesn’t just apply to gun laws. You can build an AK-47 out of a shovel. All of the nonsense they push inconveniences at best, and criminalizes at worst, the law abiding Americans among us.

The key purpose of the Second Amendment has always been self-defense; both individually and collectively in response to a federal government which has overstepped its bounds. Anyone who doubts that needs only to read James Madison’s words in Federalist 46 to understand the importance of the right to keep and bear arms as the last defense against tyranny. The idea that federal government would ban some of the most common arms in the country today makes a mockery of the Bill of Rights and the concerns of those Americans who refused to ratify the Constitution unless further restrictions on the federal government were put in place.  

Some of these anti-gun politicians may want to enact their agenda precisely because they view the Second Amendment as a threat to unchecked power, while others are simply enamored with the idea that by banning guns we can somehow create a utopian society (one, incidentally, powered by rainbows and unicorn farts). Regardless of their motivations, their ideas aren’t just wrong; they’re dangerous, both to our individual liberties and our collective security.