If there’s a bizarre story, the chances seem pretty good that it happened in Florida. Headlines that read “Florida Man” tend to snag the attention of readers as everyone wants to know what the hell is going on in the Sunshine State.
Which is why I started my headline with “Florida Man,” to be honest.
However, I also did it because, well, it’s a Florida man. Not everyone in this day and age has to deal with a sword-wielding attacker.
Officials said the two men exchanged words, but Beavers left with the wheelbarrow.
“He started to jog home with it. What he didn’t realize was that the man followed him home,” said Concepcion.
Investigators said Beavers eventually noticed that the other man was walking behind him.
“I turned behind me, and he had a sword out, chasing me, so I just kept running,” he said.
Once both men made it to Beavers’ home, surveillance video captured the subject lunging at the jogger with the sword and taking several swings.
Area resident Valerie Lyons said she was across the street when she witnessed the altercation.
“It was crazy, ’cause he was definitely hitting my neighbor with a machete over a wheelbarrow,” she said.
“I really was in shock the whole time. I was really shocked that he would do it,” said Beavers. “I was shocked. I couldn’t believe that he was going to really try to kill me for a cart.”
Except, it wasn’t a machete. It was a freaking sword.
The confrontation started when the two men began digging through a trash pile and came across a black plastic cart. The women who owned the cart later said it wasn’t up for grabs, but the two men didn’t realize it at the time.
One tried to take the cart while another man suddenly laid claim to it.
And, of course, the reasonable reaction to such a case is to draw a sword and try to kill someone over it.
So far, the police have no idea who the swordsman is or, perhaps more perplexingly, why he was just wandering around with a sword on his person. I’d be fascinated to learn the answer to that question, that’s for sure. While the right to keep and bear arms extends to all arms, including swords and knives, there are still practical considerations to keep in mind. Swords aren’t exactly what one would call “practical” in this day and age.
But there’s also a reminder for all of us in this. If you’re going for a run, figure out how to carry your firearm. You never know when you’ll be face-to-face with The Last Samurai or something. Swords are terrifying weapons when you’re unarmed, but they’re not exactly a good option for a gunfight. In fact, as a runner, I’ve been considering how best to carry while pounding out a few miles. This is a good reminder for me to step it up.
Meanwhile, the police are still looking for the Highlander there, may he be the only one.