I am that Mom. I’m the mom in the grocery store (or in church) with a gun on her prepared to defend my family or myself at any given moment. I am the Mom that has sons who aren’t afraid to tell their friends that she shoots guns. I am the Mom that gets the cross looks from other parents when they find out that I am in fact a shooter and firearms instructor. The most common reaction I receive is “really?” or, “why would you carry everywhere you go?” Generally, I chuckle and answer accordingly. My decision to be the woman who carries at all times and practices with her carry firearm on a regular basis isn’t one that all parents understand, but I am confident with my decision and my training (although we could always use more training).

Just a short six months after deciding to accept a job that required me to run a retail store-front alone the majority of the time, I knew I needed to be armed.  The moment I walked into the Sheriff’s office to apply for my first conceal carry permit was an unnerving one. I felt as though every set of eyes in the office were drilling holes through me, hindsight being what it is I know this wasn’t the case. I very slowly and diligently filled out the necessary paperwork checking countless times for errors. Within minutes I left that office a newly registered concealed weapons permit holder. Inside an hour I was at my local gun shop to make a purchase to compliment my new title. The shop was full of helpful salesmen who were more than willing to tell me exactly what I needed.  It was the moment that I started handling carry firearms while trying to see what exactly I could conceal that I was hit with a wave of emotions. Am I really prepared to wear this gun everywhere? How do I conceal this giant monstrosity on my 5’3″ curvy frame? Will I forget what I am doing when I am in peril, and more importantly can I take another’s life? I told the salesman at the gun shop I would be back later when I had some time to think. I left that shop in a panic.

Over the next few days I spent countless hours reading through blogs, watching videos, and buying books/magazines on carrying concealed trying to find the answers to my questions. Amidst my frustration I came to the realization that a portion of my flustering was based on the fact I couldn’t find much on conceal carry for women.  Most of the information that I could find for women’s carry advice I could use bits of. I looked into what I could find specifically for women on conceal carry, from techniques to firearms that were recommended. I took my new-found knowledge to a new gun shop where I wasn’t told what I HAD to buy to carry concealed, but where I was gently guided into a firearm that worked for me. I was elated to have what I thought was going to be the perfect firearm for my every day carry, now I just needed some training.

Finding a class that I would be comfortable in was going to be difficult. Contrary to my outgoing and bubbly personality, I’m less than enthusiastic or conversational when it comes to classroom settings. The overwhelming feeling of lacking knowledge, while coming to grips with short-comings, is a little anxiety provoking to me. Back to the computer I went for yet again another round of research. I found nothing in my immediate area or even a few hours out from my house. I made a few phone calls and found a friend of a friend who was willing to spend some time with me working with my conceal carry gun. I spent hours on the range and at my home practicing when it dawned on me that the holster and method I chose to carry wouldn’t work for every situation or article of clothing in my wardrobe.

Typically I’m a jeans and tee kinda girl… but what about when I’m dressed in slacks or a dress with heels. I knew it was back to the drawing board to explore my options. After spending numerous hours looking for the single most perfect carry option the light shone down and it dawned on me that I couldn’t always carry in one particular way. I found various carry methods for the significantly varying ensembles in my daily life. My personal choice of carry method varies from time to time, everything from appendix carry to a Flashbang holster. While I don’t practice at the range with the Flashbang I do practice drawing from that style of holster at home because it is a method I use.

As a competitive shooter and firearms instructor I am asked on a regular basis “what is the perfect firearm for me (or for my wife)?” I give everyone the same answer… I can’t tell you what will work best for you (or her), but I can tell you what works for me. We ladies aren’t all built the same, we don’t all have the same gun-handling experience/training, and what works for me may not work for you. I guide everyone to a basic conceal carry course that offers participants the opportunity to handle various carry firearms and instructs on carry methods. When trainees leave the course they have been ‘fitted’ for a carry firearm that will work best for them and have discovered the most comfortable style of conceal carrying. Take the time to find a firearm and carry method that’s best for you.

Once you find a firearm model you like then comes the fun part of looking at the endless options available to you to own a firearm that reflects your personality, if you so choose. So many manufacturers have expanded their selections, why not take advantage of it. Just keep in mind that conceal carrying isn’t a fashion choice, it’s a life decision… one that requires patience for finding a firearm that fits you, time training to be competent, practicing your carry method,  and lots of situational awareness.