The movies have taught us that those who take on jewelry store robberies are professionals. They come into the store methodically, one of them with a stopwatch, calling out the time they're in the store, as everyone who was already inside cowers inside. The poor staff fills a black bag with diamonds and gold, all while the villains are out before anyone has a chance to respond.
Real life isn't like that.
I'm sure there are probably some professional thieves out there; most of that is an artifact of Hollywood. An awful lot of jewelry store robberies are just ordinary thugs who grew up watching too many movies, but lack the skills of their idols.
So they just smash a car through the front of the store and rob it that way.
In Washington State, though, that did not work out as planned when the owner opened fire.
Masked would-be thieves smashed a pickup truck through the front of a Washington jewelry store in broad daylight and stormed inside — only to be sent scrambling when the store owner pulled a gun and opened fire, according to authorities and a local report.
The attempted robbery unfolded shortly after 12:25 p.m. on Tuesday at Medina Jewelers in Lynnwood.
Surveillance video shows three vehicles circling the parking lot before a white Toyota Tacoma barrels through the storefront, shattering glass and sending employees running.
Several masked suspects then rush through the opening, including one who appears to be carrying an axe.
The store owner grabbed a gun and fired, sending the group fleeing empty-handed, according to FOX13 Seattle.
Authorities say no one was injured during the incident, and apparently they're trying to determine if any of the bad guys had a gun. Considering they had a truck and an axe, I'm not entirely sure why that was pertinent. Deadly weapons are deadly weapons, after all.
This is what a lot of jewelry store robberies actually look like in the real world. They're a bunch of idiots smashing through the doors with a vehicle, usually stolen, who then try to steal as much of the merchandise as possible, even though I'm pretty sure most of them don't actually have a clue what to do with the ill-gotten gains once they have them.
This crew, however, found out that if you mess with an armed citizen, your shenanigans are anything but cheeky and fun.
Again, a motor vehicle is a missile capable of more than enough kinetic energy to kill literally anyone. An axe is kind of the quintessential murder weapon. Just ask Lizzie Borden.
Of course, this is Washington State, so who knows how they're going to view it when everything is said and done. They might make the poor store owner do community service by cutting the bad guys' lawns to make up for the trauma he inflicted upon them.
But I sincerely hope that's not the case.
Someone busts into my store that violently, and I'm going to react the same way. Especially when one of them comes out of the vehicle and toward me with something like a freaking axe.
Editor’s Note: The American people overwhelmingly support President Trump’s law and order agenda.
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